Sick

it is better to be healthy and working

than

to be sick and resting at home

than

to be sick and working

--

of course I have been sick and working and it was really an unpleasant experience. That kind of state of mind that does not allow you to think clearly and all that body ache, drowsiness , and weak feeling make things even worse.

--

and of course the best is when I can just rest at home all day staying healthy but how the heck am I gonna earn money?

Selective Response

There was once this person who introduced to me this term "selective hearing" and how he told me that I am prejudiced and hear selectively.

I have kept that as a feedback in mind and I always pursue the way for a better me.

But who would have guessed that up to this time, this particular guy, hopefully still a dear friend of ours, implicitly teaches us something from his relatively long term disappearance.

Selective response

Who would have thought that he is the one who will act so against us?

There is insistence that there might be a reason behind this, an unsatisfyingly inexplicable one:
He's just being him.

But we can't simply just accept that can't we? I don't know anymore, part of me secretly hopes that one day he will be frequenting our rare gatherings again. All of those ideals he gave us and most of those he sat away from them.

life update April 2011

One of our friends, has just made (in my view) one of the greatest decisions his life.

I believe it takes great great courage, contemplation, planning, hope and faith to do so; I can only say that most of us in the group are nowhere near that yet. I frankly admire his very action of deciding and choosing the person who is going to accompany him for the rest of his life; and it's a bit sad to think that it will still be a long way for me to be able to reach that kind of level.

Meanwhile I myself has forgotten how to love and it might be all lustful desire all along without the plain, purely naive feeling of affections that is left in my mind. Hopefully a figure who will think that I'm worthy of affection, and who is worthy of my affection too, will descend from that sky and offer humbly her heart to me. Whence that day comes, I shall offer mine too; and if we manage to make them beat harmoniously, I might be able to get to his level.... right?

 always tell myself that I'm still young but I hope I won't be the same stubborn who keeps self-acclaimed youth attitude in the future when I'm actually old.

Up to this track of life, I can only still move forward blindly, hoping to gather a courage for a change of route which now seems dark and mysterious to me.

wew

Wew

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