Everyday

..............天天不知道...................
...................................毎日わからない............................

.............................Everyday dunno .........................................
............Tiap hari tak tau ................

zzz...

WL2101 - William Luimenta

Just made this test for fun..
100% is difficult i believe! hahah go ahead and try lol..
For silent readers (if any, i.e. those who has been reading the blog but has never posted any comments) , feel free to take the test also but please leave a nick. =)

You can register you name after you answer the questions, but if they ask you to participate in whatever survey, just scroll down and click pass. If they force you to answer a question like "do you want a free ringtone" just answer no. and click pass.. sorry for the trouble..

P.S. Don't hesitate to create a new account after answering the questions
P.S. ++ (like C++ horr) Good luck for the test and Good luck for the papers irl

...

........

Determination

"天下无难事，只怕有心人。"
tian xia wu nan shi, zhi pa you xin ren
sky below no hard problem, just afraid there's hearted people
(there's no difficult problem under the sky, the matter is whether there is any determined person)

I learnt this Chinese idiom 3-4 years ago and it is still sticking on my mind. Although this sounds like a primary schoolers' idiom,(sorry, not chinese educated, and the idiom was taught by some Chinese Language teacher) but that's the principle that I should have instilled in my mindset.
Similar simple idiom is "Dimana ada kemauan, disitu ada jalan" perhaps was directly adopted from English's "Where there is a will, there is a way". What a shame for me to learn about an idiom just to know the meaning and use it for daily conversation (yeah perhaps sometimes..), but not to realize that in my life.

As mentioned in "I'm not perfect" I was so called 'attacked' by my unca's friend, but again, there's an indirect lesson from there: Oh C'mon, why only after he asked that question "So what are you going to do after you graduate? Do you want to stay here in Singapore or go back to Medan?" only from that question, I just realized how unsure I have been.
I actually did hedging and answered: "depends" and that, just that, is enough to show how weak I am as a person.
I have lacked this.. Determination.. to set a benchmark for my goal. I'm not even sure what the hell I'm going to do after the graduation; and very frankly, I was only thinking like "Ah, after graduation, go and search for some stable job and settle down here." What a simple thought. And that thought doesn't even include whether what job I'll look for and how I can contribute and earn from that job. "A normal office job will do". Yeah, that's too weak. For me it's too weak, yet, the weakness is me, myself..

Some close friends of me has shared their goals and they don't lack the determination:
Mike, The lame one: "I want to go back and equip myself with some cooking skill. I want to prepare for entrepreneurial business in F&B and maybe If there's a chance, I want to open some food service in the coming new TownCampus (New hostel)."
CheaSingKong: "I want to retire before the age 27 or 30 and to realize that I want to start a business. That's why I start going to financial planning talks and go to entrepreneurship club to learn something."

"Hah!" I told SingKong during the three person dinner at K.Gourmet on his birthday,
"In Singapore, I realize this is very popular: what I want to do is to have a property like public building and have my name/surname there like 'Luimenta's Building'; just like Lee Kong Chian's Building for National Library and University hall" (wiki even says the largest Lecture theater in NTU and School of Business in SMU is under his name)

And.. That probably is just a very childish dream....

especially with my current situation: even survival in this country might be a problem!

=====

Mike, The lame one was in my room and we were somehow chatting about interview and how he had made me realized how important determination is. He mentioned about the Matriculation Fair interview and I was applying for Vice Project Director and Vice Publicity head. Well, I knew I wouldn't have had any chance for the former post because I never had any relevant experience about driving a team in a leadership position for such a huge project, but it was my desire to take that kind of position. But as I have predicted that that's not so possible, I put Vice Publicity head as my second choice because I was quite sure that I could take the position easily. I was the Publicity Head doing most of the publicity related thing in previous year's Matriculation Fair and now I'm only applying for VICE publicity head.
So I went there empty handed, the Project Director greeted me, asked me about holiday commitments, any other relevant experience for Vice PD position, and that's all. Then after several days I was informed that my application for both posts was unsuccessful. It was like a slap on my face.
And after that chat with mike, I just realized that it was my own fault. I don't lack the experience: for the latter position; but the passion. At least two other applicants brought their portfolios and one of them were chosen for the job. That's the thing! I didn't even bother to show them (the interviewers) not only the experience but also the passion.
Because the determination is not enough.

=================================
Dammit.
=================================

+Me being over-sized is because of no determination to control my intake of food and do regular sports (though maybe we play sports often like basketball, maybe indeed my intake of food is really really getting more and more uncontrolled).

+My score being so low is because of no determination to study harder and harder, to contribute my best to projects and assignments and even to properly prepare for final examination!

+The adobe premiere that I dreamed to master by last year's summer holiday! It's almost another one year again and I never started to learn! Never had any determination to do so
.
+Hiragana and Katakana (japanese) characters that I wished to master by last year's December holiday! I never memorized them all. No strong determination at all.

____
+My
____

+Never learnt any musical instruments! Wished to master one or two but never had the determination to do so either!

+My room in "wrecked ship" condition! Never had any determination to tidy it up.

+Welcome Fest (Resident Assistant - Freshmen Orientation in PGP) Chairperson appointment. Didn't dare to volunteer! Wanted it so badly but determination too weak to have my hand raised up so that our boss can appoint me. In the end, the position was taken by someone else.

+No determination to contribute in last year's PINUS executive committee and NUSSU Bizcom's Management Committee. Missing in Action for the term of appointment for the former; Quit even before halfway for the latter.

My goodness.. I'm so screwed!
so ashamed of myself..

======================================
Still down to have this kind of determination. not yet DETERMINED to have DETERMINATION!
===tsk......
William, you suck

Errrh

This Blog has been and is still under-construction!
Wew.. no time to edit because although not studying, somehow I have been always occupied like hanging out; shopping for events; sport session, etc. etc..
And changing templates that can give me full edits!
wew..

____________________________________

lalalaala.. Remember to come for R6 Destress Session at R6 Courtyard
Today at 20.30pm!

C ya hahah

Get over

Oh well, William, get over it now.. swim up and don't let your feelings drown you anymore.

The youtube video was cool... first time seeing her on video haha.. I was trying to get over her but why do you gave me that link?? Why Dit?
..And Ted, "the more you know?"
hahaha..
And just now Sum was like "I just saw her today! She was so beautiful! You have made a good choice"
"Oh I was just joking, nong, I never saw her."
All always prevented me to think about her again..

__________________________________
Just as I was getting over all of my stupidity
__________________________________

slowly she will disappear from my mind, I'm sure.. That someday? That day will never come... Changed my mind..
And so will William inside her, only as someone she had known;
She was online once again. Not a delightful chat; and if I were her, I would know that I was thinking something like "Hey bro, cut it out already; stop bugging me; I'm not interested in you, not a bit".


Forget it.. How have I wasted another year thinking of someone I can't reach.. I never see her anymore and hopefully won't see her again anymore...
Not worth it..
Though it will take some time


Please give me the chance to delete her out of this head and let me start anew

Someone: "wow, you are a sentimental fellow :) " ; Yes, I'll take that as a compliment.
But that means William is just a weak and stupid guy.



Random Shouts:
___________________________________________________________
To Mech Eng having their finals today: Mechanical Design! All the best, men!!
=============
It was design module last semester that I managed to open the class roster and see the name-list... Pfff.....
___________________________________________________________
I'll apply for internship!!
___________________________________________________________
I'll change this blog's layout!!!
___________________________________________________________
I'll put this blog's address on my Windows Messenger nickname so my Yahoo! Messenger friends can see the link. I don't care anymore.
___________________________________________________________
I'll start preparing for finals (if I'm in mood, currently I'm not)
.
.
.
.
.


Thank you for giving me a chance to adore you this whole year. I shall now attempt to cease my empty dreams..
Those were beautiful and they will always be: beautiful and I suppose, dreams

NOOB

Something that has come out from my mind for quite some time.. Another picture post, just a bit lazy to post some words..
What a noob I have been

I'm not perfect

it is my cousin's birthday today. He's actually in secondary 4, going to have his "O" level in this November. So his mother, my aunt, called me to have lunch with their family. There's guy, a friend of my uncle, but they are quite close with him and my uncle looks like a father or an older brother to him.

so this guy is a young: around 20-30 something but looks really young but matured, maybe like a third year undergrad. He's pretty well-built and handsome as well. A pair of big eyes, tough jaw and a nose with nice protrusion. His height is fair, around 168, only prediction though because he's abit shorter than me.. He's single and every time we (me, my cousin's family and him) have some good dinner outside, the owner would have recognized them and would always compliment his good look.

Not only he has the look but he's also supposedly well educated. He's got a degree from the States with a GPA of 3.6 out of 4. And not only he has the look and education, he's got wealth! a loaded guy with a home like palace in Medan, and a three-room condominium at Tanglin's road (where rich people stay, it's the area around some embassies' offices if i'm not mistaken.) with a jaguar here in Singapore, if i'm not mistaken another jaguar in Medan and some other cars i suppose. I wouldn't want to comment whether he was born rich or he obtained those bunches of wealth alone.

Okay, but today we didn't ride the jaguar, instead, it was a Nissan sedan from my uncle's condo. And then we went to "AhYat Seafood", some seafood restaurant that i just visited for the first time. So we were like having some chit-chat and he shifted the topic to my education I have had in Singapore. First he asked about what I was studying and I became a bit irritated when he asked me about how well I have performed, ("what's your score?").

"3.1" I answered.. "out of 5.0"

I knew I'm stupid, or at least I don't have the will to study really hard and so I gave some excuses to save my face. I'm not sure whether he's a hardworker too but man, it's NUS here, it was in the world's top twenty and it's not that easy to score dude!

His implications was good: that I should study hard; but i just don't like the tone when he compared 3.1 out of 5.0 and his 3.6 out of 4 to my uncle.

So yea he was like "how are you gonna compete with others to find job with that score?"

"Yea that's why I'm improving my score step by step". /*Bullshit, I can improve my score but the school has been insane! If we can only improve our score by memorizing! My score's not gonna improve. Singaporeans were trained for it (i guess) and I was quite annoyed when some sporean said to me during last semester's exam "You just have to memorize what". And because it's NUS, moreover 95% of the class was Singaporean, and I just wished good luck for myself.*/

Yes, I admit I have always heard about CAP affects, but it only affects your first pay. This remark may sound a little "lazy" because for me it sounds like "no need to study hard man, the rest depends on yourself after you are working. So just relax."

But I guess maybe I should indeed study "a bit" harder?

Second thing, he was asking "so are you gonna stay in Singapore after you work (satisfy the tuition grant contract) ?".

As usual, my favorite action was to hedge(Yay for those who have take Professional Communication) and so I gave a vague answer: "Maybe no, maybe yes.."

"Which one is nicer? Singapore or Medan?"

"well, Singapore has its nice factors and so does Medan!" I tried to sound friendly

But this was analyzed as if I'm someone with no stand. I think he was indirectly telling me to make up my mind. "Dude, you can't be unsure, if you want to stay in Singapore, just have the will and everything will go smooth, and so if you are determined to live your life in Medan." That's the indirect message.

Yes, I get this indirect message because I think I'm quite observant to catch what people are talking. But heck care. Man! life is not as easy as we think and even if I want to stay in Singapore, everything can just be difficult because circumstances might be unpredictable. For me, after I think awhile I got this analogy, "Life is like playing chess.. To win, will alone is not enough, you need strategy!" Our life is not as smooth as his and he has generalized hastily (yay for those who has taken Critical Thinking and Writing) if he had assumed that opportunity will be always with him all the time as long as our will is there! I cannot just decide on one choice because we'll have to see the circumstances first right?


For him, life could have been very easy but maybe not for us.
He may have led a perfectly fine life, unless for his status being single, or maybe that's because he's got too high qualifications and criteria? Such a perfectionist.


I'll live my life the way I want. With imperfectness but I'll give in more and more and learn more and more! Perfectness makes you blind from imperfects' point of view. We know the hardships and isn't it living life about?

My Angel

A picture drawn in First semester of 2007/2008. Yeah, the beauty inspired by her. That's why I always described her with "just like an angel". Just added the clouds [cloudy mood :( these weeks, longest post.haha..] few hours ago and added my signature in. TheLameOne has this heading on his blog page: "a picture speaks louder than a thousand words... i'd rather do the thousand words routine". For today, I'll just do the picture routine. Still.. trying to forget her is like myself trying to tear this picture I've drawn. The more you want to tear it up the harder it gets you to tear it.

(click the picture to enlarge) P.S. this is not a prank like on one of TLO's post, lol

Disclaimer: This picture was created and owned by this blog owner namely William, also known as William Luimenta, any unauthorized usage without the permission of the owner shall be prohibited and the owner has the rights to claim the picture under his name.

P.S. #2: hahaha before you all give any comments and if you want to do so, some remarks like "I can tear the picture for you, lol" is already expected so not fun anymore.. lol..